trying to find a joke for pun times
about my gynaecologist having a crush on me
Levi still have the whatsapp history
it wasnt on there
i searched
it's not here either
maybe i misspelled it
Levi searched for gyn
maybe that's the part I got wrong
Levcause you dym
Levyou have to create frankenstein that you are going to fuck
you can only choose one body part per person
give me yours while I think
LevI know I want geneva's shoulders
shoulders?
Levyeah, she had some pretty sporty shoulders
boi you haven't even picked a stomach or a head
Levwho said I'm choosing a head at all
men are pigs
big fan of that one photo of a veterinarian showing a cat how fat he is
Levwhy did the cat let himself go
why do any of us
Levwe dont
i am a taut, prime specimen
a specimen of what
Levi was hoping the doctor would tell me
I can't talk to you about what my therapist told me
so this question inappropriate af
it's breaking the hippo oath
Levno the hippo oath
is the one where you promise to always eat the food between the teeth of your patient
man
sign me up for that doctor
bitch what
if I had a dollar for every time you've stolen a lovingly crafted question
I'd hire someone to make this game
and it would look good too
Levyou did
for free
because it has never happened
oh please
you know I'm right
Levlady, you are the graphic designer for this game
you played yoself
none of my art has been implemented yet
Lev"my art isn't bad it just doesn't exist"
today I was watching a tiktok
where a girl was like ladiesss
if you want your orgasm to last longer and feel more intense
you should try this thing called 'edging'
and then she proceeded to explain what it is
and I was like girllllll
I've been doing this since I was 13
Levpeople on tiktok are like 12
that seems like a reasonable time to learn
good for them
us millenial women
we walked
so they could run
and stop before the finish line
and hang around there for a bit
Levi wish i went to a college water balloon fight
you still can
Levwhy are you always pro me being creepy
I just want you to be true to yourself
Levok i gotta go they're expecting me to fly this plane
sky bird sky bird skybird
Levi tell you what
i shouldn't have eaten a whole packet of gummy peaches
never say this
Bulgaria has the lowest rate in europe of people reporting chronic depression
Levaka inverse of cultural stigma against self identifying as having depression
except slovenia
where they are all sad
🇷🇴Romania🤝Bulgaria🇧🇬 Happiest countries in Europe 😎😎😎👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 No sadness here 😎😎😎 Send help pls 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
LevTHESE TEARS ARE BECAUSE OF THE WIND FROM ALL THE GOOD TIME WE ARE HAVING
PLEASE DO NO INSPECT FURTHER
IM NOT CRYING IM JUST CUTTING CUCUMBERS
LevWHY DO THE CUCUMBERS BLEED I MUST NOT ASK
Can I watch Emily in Paris without you
Levno
not allowed
I didn't think you liked it so much
I barely like it enough
It's so saccharine
Levi like to watch it with you
and talk about outfits and hot takes
Ok ok
I just don't feel like waiting a month to see it
Levyou literally just told me you barely like it
hahaha
Levpick a lane
I
I do like it
It's addictive garbage
Levyou gotta wait for your second marshmallow
They didn't put those babies on a plane with nothing to do
when i lived in america and people would say Hi how are you
I'd usually make an effort to answer how I actually was
or to at least say something besides good how are you
I'd say something like 'well i'm not loving this weather hahaha"
or "I'm doing great, I just found 10 dollars in my jacket!"
now every time i talk to catherine she's like hi how are you
and I'm like girl it's 10am and I am having ice cream in bed
like my life is obviously not super on track
but for the purposes of this conversation yes I'm fine.
why do guys named Timothy go by Tim when they could go by Moth
personally I'd go with Mothy
Levbro they got Imot sitting right there
fuck outta here
you just backpedaling
so I don't think you wanna fuck our new cat
Levi find this truly baffling
tbh I may be projecting
Levbecause you want to fuck the cat?
it's a cute cat
but it's family now
so I can't
Levdunno man
incest porn is up there in popularity nowadays
help me step-cat, I'm stuck in the dryer
we need to find the person who invented seedless watermelons
probably some japanese guy
and get him to work on the stoneless mango
Levthey are getting smaller i think
lil dumb brain mangos
good
i want them as small as cherry pits within a year
Levwhat if you choke on it
then I shall die as I lived
Levdick deep in mango
thank you
I did not have a punchline
Levyeah i felt it
Levbulgarian
That’s the toughest kind
It just never goes away
You would know
Levwhy?
Cause you still haven’t managed to get rid of me
Try as you might
I will never leave lev
LevI never tried to get rid of you
I cherish you as a companion in life
and think I would be worse off without you
Gay?
why would you say no to dick cage
what if your dick broke the law
I realise that might sound rapey
what if your dick broke tax law