Levman, every time I eat at home
I remember that episode of 30 rock where tina fey almost chokes to death
I don't have the kind of upper body strength to heimlich myself out of that
so I stop eating
it's how I keep thin
Stopping eating is never the right answer
you'll have to help me find a winter coat in the markets
so take me to the places cool people get rid of their old crap
LevThe dump it is
I've always wanted mittens out of dead rats
Hobo chic
LevThat's less hobo chic and more way too into taxidermy chic
there's no chic in taxidermy :(
there's no chic in anything that has tax in it
taxis, taxes, chuck norris taxas ranger
I should create a quiz
"Which bathroom utility are you?"
Options
Toilet, bidet, sink, tub
LevI would be a jacuzzi
Because i forcefully expel fluid
From every hole
what can I put on a projector for a dinner party
last time I put the titanic sinking in real time
wasn't a winner
did you learn some korean phrases?
LevNope
Didn't even try
you're a true American
LevI just hold up my Samsung phone as like a peace sign
And hope that works
LevAlso im in Korea now
how awesome is it
try to grade it
from north korea to K-pop
LevRight now we're at like communist Vietnam levels
The landscape is great though
are you sure you're in SOUTH Korea?
LevWait there's more than one Korea?
you should have checked at the airport
damn, I can apply for a job at my old university in the netherlands
they even have something for you
LevI'm pretty sure i would need a phd
I'm pretty sure it's enough to just believe in yourself
LevI've already told you my after death wish, right?
you wanna be shot out into space?
LevNope
Taxidermied into the fonzie position
So that when someone tells a joke that falls flat they can do the finger guns at me
And say
That guy gets it
ughhh
imagine how many terrible jokes you'd be supporting tho
LevThat's the beauty
Joke welfare
LevI think i just flirted with a 45 year old german
Sure could blitz krieg my lebensbraum
Bonetown has changed its name to Bonebergstein
LevI don't know her address
bonetown is hard to locate indeed
Levbonetown visits me
that was not the right message to pop up on my screen as I was showing a colleague an email
Happy friendversary Левон
LevHow can we have a friendaversary if we've never made our friendship known in the eyes of God?
I never did buy you that ring
LevIt would have been inappropriate anyways
Beyonce had not set out the rules yet
but she has told me to only put a ring on it if I like it
and I only tolerate it
but he hung himself for real
Levdear god
renn I'm about to go to sleep why are you shitting on my dreams?
it's what I do
I don't remember the original purpose of our friendship but something went wrong along the way
movie?
Levgoing kiting probably :c
You're really getting into it huh
Levit's really fun
Don't wreck yourself
Levdon't worry I checked myself
LevI am a software engineer now
not a mechanical one
What a useless thing to be
Levtell that to the people that pay me, yo
or better yet
don't
don't tell me what to do, you're going away to have a social life and what not
I wanna see that weird deer get his head cut off
Levwhy do you always have to make things about sex?