LevI figureed at least 5 - 10 more years
what with regulations and testing and all
I thought so too
Especially with Americans constantly out-suing each other
Its a bold move
Levwe try
it's a "we", is it?
LevI want to make my millions slipping on a small avoidable puddle yo
it's the dream
LevI wish everyone could live in one place
except the people I don't like
Yes
I wish they lived in a different place
Levsomewhere terrible
like the parts of florida without cuban people
With low water pressure
Levwho needs a shower when you've got 100% humidity
What is this hell we've created
Levit is literally just regular florida
Today we hit a sparrow with the car :(
I saw it fall on the road like a little potato
Levlook on the bright side
it was probably too quick for it to feel anything
the only ones in pain will be its tiny sparrow family
calling out for daddy
but daddy don't answer
Did you win quiz night
Levnyet :c
Что за мужчина такой, блять
Levyop tvayu mats suka blyat chotr
v'pizde
Alright alright Tolstoy
Take it easy
Do your parents even remember me
Serious question
Levthey sometimes ask me what you're up to nowadays
and I shrug
Thanks
Levany time
I kept thinking last week that I'd come back to 744 emails of my bosses complaining that I'm not there
Bit I'm a lot less important than I think I am
LevAre you sure they know you work there?
They may think I'm the maid
Because pretty much all day I'm either in the kitchen or the toilet
LevMaids don't leave rooms more dirty
I am marking my territory
LevEveryone says please stop
Anyone who has a problem with me can see me in my toilet-lair
She reports to me
I know all your kinks
Even THAT one
LevI don't know man
I think if you knew that one you would have reevaluated your view on knees
and refugees
You don't influence my life in any way
Levmaybe irish guys aren't the best idea
cause I mean...best case scenario they're the other guy in a devil's three way
and I can't compete with an irish accent
Meh, my loins are at room temperature
Levdear god
my loins are afire
LevI would have ugly children
so that they would grow up knowing they could have been beautiful
but I'm the goddamn boss of this house you little shits
hahah I was telling the same thing to my friends
also I remember one time when I was 6 I had the courage to ask my mom for ice cream with no occasion
and she said yes
I think that was the happiest moment of my childhood
if my children ask for ice cream I will ground them
so that they know they can't initiate their own happiness
yaaay, an old-fashioned sleepover
will we do face masks and talk about our crushes
LevWe're adults
We don't talk about crushes
Only crushing depression
same thing, am i rite
hahahaha?
LevI want to start ending ask my sentences with question marks?
Really emphasizes the existential confusion of day to day life?
but makes you sound like a colossal douche?
Leveven spies can be made into double agents
You're not as good in bed
As is needed
LevI beg to differ
literally, though
please differ
I have an idea
each of us will pick a movie from their childhood
mine is rover dangerfield
Levwhat now?
is it in black and white?
it's before your time
it's before anyone's time, really
Levliterally
it was released in 1991
HAHAHAHAH
oh jesus christ
LevAre you guys in a mall?
I need shoes
He needs therapy
LevDid having you as a sister become too much too deal with?
It was too much after the second year
That's why he started pooping in my shoes
Hopefully he'll grow out of it soon
It was autocorrect
I meant to say
"Just you girl, Lev can suck on both my dicks"
Levwhen'd you get a second?
When I took yours
Levyou must have taken my backup
the one I use with women who I think probably aren't safe to use my primary one with
enjoy the syphillis
You enjoy it, you just sucked it
Along with another one, I don't even know where that one came from
Levalso RR Martin is pretty terrible at writing
he described someones eyes as "darker than milk"
considering milk is bright white
that means that the set of things which are darker than milk
that includes a lot of colors in the spectrum
Levcontains everything except maybe the sun
I read an article by david wong
and he included a passage my martin describing the thoughts of daenerys
and how she thinks of her boobs all the time
Levhehehe
"she walked her boobs across the street"
Levyeeeeaaaaah
pretty much
"I can hear them talking about my boobs", she thought, boobily
Levshe boobed her boobs to the boobing of the boobers, she boobed
what boobery!