toilet.

Asadit's a fun story to tell
like it's fun to say that you met one of your greatest friends in a toilet
Levit's a better to tell people that my current friend IS a toilet

tearing up.

Levare you... tearing up?
yeah, that was the nicest thing you've said to me
Levugh, you're such a little gay bitch

silence.

LevI can't listen to silence Renn
you know that
silence is the only way to communicate with you
at least that's what your girlfriend told me
AYOOOOOO
high-fiving a million angels

photos.

Levyou should see how many photos Stefan is taking all the goddamn time. He has a million pictures of a seagull's asshole.

fitting.

Levroboman represents who I am on the inside
Asada cardboard robot?
Levyes
how fitting
AsadHAHHAHA OH RENN
fitting
cause things fit in boxes
that was brilliant! :D
LevI...oh jesus
figured you'd appreciate it
Levit's like you hit rock bottom
but then
you didn't stop
you just kept going

white.

AsadChristmas eve has turned white
the most racist colour

snowflake.

Levexcept I'm flying out from DC
god knows why
Kabirwhat in the hell
what sense does that make
LevI'm a snowflake
and so are my flight routes
KabirGay?

setup.

Levwhy don't we have the perfect word for retarded?
Asadwe do
LevI tried thinking of one
Asadits called Lev
Levbut my mind just kept screaming "Asad"
goddamn it
I had a whole set up and shit

renn things.

Levalso
I am renn
look at me prance around
and do renn things
like fuck clowns

plane crash.

Levalright
time to fly
perce bitches
have a good trip
wait
I forgot to tell you a hilarious airplane crash story
damnit
KabirThat is horrible, Renn
I hope you die in a plane crash
that's statistically improbable
Kabirbut
no
my metajoke
noo
MUHAHAHA
Kabir:c

mouth.

middle-aged?
pshhhyea
LevI was just trying to be nice
the only middle I'm in is the middle of my youth
LevI kept reading mouth
instead of youth
trying to figure out if you were making a blowjob joke
that'd be one fucking weird blowjob joke

mocha.

KabirBut yes
I've got the mocha fever
Asaddont ever call it that
KabirThat's not a thing
But
Levloca for that mocha

insults 101.

Asaddid you ever get the pictures?
LevAsad, no one wants your dick pics
Asadi sent those ones to lev's.mom@cougartown.com
Kabirapostrophes are illegal in email addresses
Lev wins by default
Sorry Asad
believability is key when insulting others

google.

Levdude
Asad
what the fuck
Kabir...Have you been using google?
Levwhat
the
fack
Asadare my stalking skills scaring you?
Levwe told you to stop using google, Asad
that shit'll make your teeth fall out
and your dick turn into a wrinkly mess, like a sausage left in the sun

diary.

LevEntry 432:
Still Asad here, still stuck in this day. I don't know how many hours, how many days have passed, but the clock says it's been 15 minutes since I started chronicling this day. If someone finds this, tomorrow, maybe the day after, tell the world this: I am incredibly fucking bored.
- From the collected diaries of Asad "DickMouth"