pmsing.

what's wrong with me, I'm such a crybaby tonight
I'm probably PMSing or something, this is bullshit

playlist awesomeness.

LevRenn, your roadtrip playlist better be awesome
because mine is bitchin'
and we can't mix them if they're not the same level of snazzy
how dare you even think of doubting me
my playlist will blow your mind
your playlist is nothing
it's just a figment of my playlist's imagination
LevPshh, my playlist is all that is and ever will be
it is concentrated freedom
during the revolutionary war, the founding fathers would shoot up using my playlist instead of heroin
my playlist is what made that guy eat that other guy's face
LevHitler's mother did my playlist while pregnant with Hitler
hahahah :D
damn. lev
that was almost as awesome as my playlist

phatass.

LevJust Fatass
Phatass
LevWe named him after your mother, kabir
don't listen to him, kabir
that's the fat talking

penis (part deux).

god, every morning you guys
every morning I wake up and look at your banter to see what I've missed
it's like 95% penis
I think you might have some unresolved issues or something
Kabirpenis
I mean, uh
I mean
penis
Shit

penis.

KabirSuck every penis
You know these penises exist in the nether regions of most men?
suck them
all
LevI will see you tomorrow if you manage not to implode into your own vagina
KabirHow is that unreasonable
That's a welcoming silence
I'm glad that you are at work with those penises

origin story.

Asadstop ruining this
Pun Times is a spoiler free zone.
LevWhat, Asad's gonna watch Breaking Bad?
should be called Phun Times

ok maybe.

Asadyes
ok maybe
but you should still respond to it
Levthat was the wrong order
it should have been "maybe, ok yes"
AsadFUCK
YOU

not vampyre (part deux).

KabirMotherfuckers keep asking when I'll be done with all this blood I have
It's not even funny anymore
it's still polite of them to ask
for permission
Kabirfuck that, one tried to go for it while I was asleep
FUCK YOU VAMPIRE I DONT EVEN LIKE YOU

not vampyre.

Asadi have a friend over
... not anympre :(
KabirI read that as
'not vampyre'
and thought
'Oh, that's unfortunate.'

mexico.

LevOh man
I ordered from grubhub
and they brought me Pepsi from ~Mexico
Kabirmexico
where the bubbles in soda come from farts
enjoy it

martian magellan.

Kabirthey'll call me the martian magellan
It sucks though since all the jobs will be like
farmer
Man Internet is going to be so laggy out there
yes
and farming will be your only joy
so farm away, martian magellan

lack of boobs.

KabirHow do you enjoy the beauty of Iron Sky
But not like 300?
300 was a fucking visual masterpiece
with a simple, resonant story
Asadlack of boobs

ketchup.

KabirStop smearing ketchup on your crotch
I know you love it
but, have some decency, man
Levbut you don't have to ~love it
Asadi got called Professor Asad too Lev
so you suck my ketchupy dick

iron man.

LevThat story didn't have Iron Man in it so I was bored
Kabirmeh, Iron Man has many sticks up his ass
LevSticks of awesome, yes

improbable things.

I even made an OKCupid profile to make the transition to single life easier
KabirThat's weird, I also did something highly improbable earlier
I was leaving the taco bell but instead of taking a cab home I farted wings and swam to the moon on a hedgehog
LevConsidering the hell that Taco Bell makes your lower intestine, that's not ~that improbable
especially not when you consider how many things go in and out of your anus